Riverside County Supervisor Jeff Stone (Republican) floated the brilliant idea for the counties of Riverside, San Diego, Orange, San Bernardino, Fresno, Kern, Kings, Imperial, Inyo, Madera, Mariposa, Mono and Tulare (otherwise known as the meth, desert and forest counties) to break away from the evil socialist republic to the north and form their own state to be called Southern California. Los Angeles was conspicuously absent from the proposed treason against our great state.

Mr. Stone lamented, “I am tired of California being the laughingstock of late-night jokes. We must change course immediately or create a new state.” Well, you’re not really helping with this kind of whiny talk.

I’m sure that the great State of Parking Lots and Agrabusiness would be a great place to live. Unfortunately, the dream of establishing a low-tax, limited government, conservative, real-America outpost on the Left Coast is hampered by the low-tax, limited government, conservative, real-America politicians who run these very counties that are supposed to lead the revolution against the evils of an active government.

Apparently, fellow Riverside County Supervisor Marion Ashley feels that the county has no business spending money to get out of California. Come on guys, think of it as an investment! The Board of Supervisors refused to support the plan Tuesday, instead supporting a summit on local government to discuss the issues facing the state. They’re even going to invite people from the other (communist counties) to the north.

This of course isn’t the first time someone has proposed to secede from California. One of the more famous attempts would have merged Northern California and Southern Oregon in to the megastate of Jefferson. It would have succeeded too if the Japanese hadn’t conveniently bombed Pearl Harborjust days before they were going to vote on it.

This kind of stuff happens all the time actually because there’s nothing Californians hate more than California; unless they’re not there, then it’s whatever unfortunate state they happen to be driving through on their way to New York. Californians are crazy, Riverside needs to get used to it. Running away and taking all your sweet sweet mobile home dealerships and vacant lots with you won’t solve the problem.